The Nelsonites

Long ago, in the back woods of Michigan, a boy was born! His name was Jacob! AKA Timeonious. As his life progressed he dreamed of creating his own religion. So he did. It was called Nelsonism. It really didn't have a god besides its leader, Timeonious. Eventually he converted others to his weird ass religion and became Nelsonites. They are the leading exporter in porn and their only known weapon is getting a stick or something hard and long (lol pen0r) and sticking it in between someone 's legs while they're walking/running and shouting "In the spokes!".

They are also good friends with Stronger Than Ass.